People don't change. So what you see in the beginning, is generally what you get. Sometimes people succeed in cleverly sending their representatives but overall, what you see is what you get. I am often tempted to be with someone and project onto them all the awesome qualities I think they should have, only to later realize, wait, they are who they are, why am I trying to make them someone else? Then I realize, I take the best from past and try to bring it with me into the future. Would it be easier to walk around with the hurt and pain? For me, It's the good bits from the past that mess up what the present is and could be. When it comes to relationships the past is best left in the past and good memories, no matter how good, should also be left among the bad.